My son turned me on to this...
Saturday, February 27, 2010
Friday, February 26, 2010
So typical Flick
The bike race/incentive program at the gym started 5 weeks ago and after my initial misstep I got off to a good start.
The event is 21 "races" comprised of 3 rides a week for 7 weeks. The rides differ in difficult and distance with most of the expresso courses being between 4 and 9 miles long.
There are about 40 people participating in the event. Of those 30 or so are normal rational people who view exercise has a healthy release. They show up, ride the bike for 15-30 minutes at a reasonable pace and enjoy the experience. The other five people are idiots. They ride as hard as they can, sweating all over everything and everyone, grunting, and making a total spectacle of themselves. As I was leading after two weeks, I suppose that makes me the king of the idiots.
I'm the new guy, an outsider, to the gym and by the third week I started getting the impression that the "insiders" really didn't appreciate me coming in and taking the lead in their contest. At first it wasn't anything definitive, just some mumbling and sidebar conversations. Then a few comments were made a little louder and in closer proximity to me...vague references, but enough to make me take notice. By the end of week three someone had etched "ringer" on my scoresheet...no smiley face either.
I showed up for the beginning of week 4 to do my ride and one of the regulars was suddenly and unexpectedly friendly to me. " How ya doing Flick ?" Then after exchanging some idle conversation he casually mentioned, " Did you notice that someone's beating you ?"
Sure enough I went over to the score book and there on page one was a name that hadn't previously been in the book, Bob Benson. And I looked over Bob Benson's times and they were almost identical to mine, but on a couple of the long events he had gone under me by 10-15 seconds.
"No worries", I thought. I had been riding at around 315 watts and knew that I could go a little harder if I needed to. That ride I buckled down and rode 320. Thursday I came in and the Bob Benson had ridden 4 second fast. With an audience of insiders keeping watch from in the shadows I hopped on the bike, buried myself with a 325. When I came in on Saturday, Benson had gone 10 second fast again.
Now I was getting, as I'm apt to get, a little paranoid. I googled Bob Benson. Nothing. Bob Benson cycling. nothing. Bob Benson triathlon. Zilch. Bob Benson running. Nada. The guy was a ghost.
So I started wondering...maybe these bastards just made up Bob Benson, and they're just waiting for me to put in my time, then they're writing in a time just slightly fast than mine just to mess with me. Just to crack me. If that's what they were doing, I was going to be pissed...although I'd be equally impressed because if their goal was to crack me it was starting to work.
Saturday I pounded out 330 watts, almost shitting my pants in the process. When I came in on Tuesday, I'd been beaten by 40 seconds !!!
It was more than I could take. From Sunday afternoon through Thursday morning I stopped in the gym before work and after work looking for the so called Bob Benson. No matter when I went in, day or night, no such guy. When I posted my time on Tuesday ( 324 watts) his time was posted first thing Wednesday morning....5 second faster.
Which brings up to last night's ride. I showed up and most of them were there. All the sneaky, conniving, devious little bastards. All smiles and "how ya doing". Congratulating me on my improvement of the last two weeks. I KNEW what they were up to and I wasn't going to have any of it. I pretty much insinuated that I knew that Bob Benson was a ghost, just there to fuck with me, and that whoever was up to is was risking life and limb cause " the whole contest was killing me and if it came right down to it, I was taking as many other people as I could down with me !"
Even I'm not sure what they hell I was talking about, but the rant did succeed freaking everyone out enough to clearing the room.
I used my anger to good use, trying to break the 335 barrier. I made it about 4 of the 7 miles at 340 and then the wheels started coming off. The last two miles were pure hell. I was up out of the saddle, grunting and trying not to vomit and came limping across the line at a 323 watt average.
I was laying across the handlebars with my chest heaving....a defeated lump of a man....muttering and swearing about those bastards and their little game when a guy climbed on the bike next to me. " Wow, good effort !!!! 323 Watts average is huge...you must be Flick, right ?"
" Thanks...and yeah I'm Flick", I got out between gasps.
" Oh, nice to meet you. I'm Bob Benson"
The event is 21 "races" comprised of 3 rides a week for 7 weeks. The rides differ in difficult and distance with most of the expresso courses being between 4 and 9 miles long.
There are about 40 people participating in the event. Of those 30 or so are normal rational people who view exercise has a healthy release. They show up, ride the bike for 15-30 minutes at a reasonable pace and enjoy the experience. The other five people are idiots. They ride as hard as they can, sweating all over everything and everyone, grunting, and making a total spectacle of themselves. As I was leading after two weeks, I suppose that makes me the king of the idiots.
I'm the new guy, an outsider, to the gym and by the third week I started getting the impression that the "insiders" really didn't appreciate me coming in and taking the lead in their contest. At first it wasn't anything definitive, just some mumbling and sidebar conversations. Then a few comments were made a little louder and in closer proximity to me...vague references, but enough to make me take notice. By the end of week three someone had etched "ringer" on my scoresheet...no smiley face either.
I showed up for the beginning of week 4 to do my ride and one of the regulars was suddenly and unexpectedly friendly to me. " How ya doing Flick ?" Then after exchanging some idle conversation he casually mentioned, " Did you notice that someone's beating you ?"
Sure enough I went over to the score book and there on page one was a name that hadn't previously been in the book, Bob Benson. And I looked over Bob Benson's times and they were almost identical to mine, but on a couple of the long events he had gone under me by 10-15 seconds.
"No worries", I thought. I had been riding at around 315 watts and knew that I could go a little harder if I needed to. That ride I buckled down and rode 320. Thursday I came in and the Bob Benson had ridden 4 second fast. With an audience of insiders keeping watch from in the shadows I hopped on the bike, buried myself with a 325. When I came in on Saturday, Benson had gone 10 second fast again.
Now I was getting, as I'm apt to get, a little paranoid. I googled Bob Benson. Nothing. Bob Benson cycling. nothing. Bob Benson triathlon. Zilch. Bob Benson running. Nada. The guy was a ghost.
So I started wondering...maybe these bastards just made up Bob Benson, and they're just waiting for me to put in my time, then they're writing in a time just slightly fast than mine just to mess with me. Just to crack me. If that's what they were doing, I was going to be pissed...although I'd be equally impressed because if their goal was to crack me it was starting to work.
Saturday I pounded out 330 watts, almost shitting my pants in the process. When I came in on Tuesday, I'd been beaten by 40 seconds !!!
It was more than I could take. From Sunday afternoon through Thursday morning I stopped in the gym before work and after work looking for the so called Bob Benson. No matter when I went in, day or night, no such guy. When I posted my time on Tuesday ( 324 watts) his time was posted first thing Wednesday morning....5 second faster.
Which brings up to last night's ride. I showed up and most of them were there. All the sneaky, conniving, devious little bastards. All smiles and "how ya doing". Congratulating me on my improvement of the last two weeks. I KNEW what they were up to and I wasn't going to have any of it. I pretty much insinuated that I knew that Bob Benson was a ghost, just there to fuck with me, and that whoever was up to is was risking life and limb cause " the whole contest was killing me and if it came right down to it, I was taking as many other people as I could down with me !"
Even I'm not sure what they hell I was talking about, but the rant did succeed freaking everyone out enough to clearing the room.
I used my anger to good use, trying to break the 335 barrier. I made it about 4 of the 7 miles at 340 and then the wheels started coming off. The last two miles were pure hell. I was up out of the saddle, grunting and trying not to vomit and came limping across the line at a 323 watt average.
I was laying across the handlebars with my chest heaving....a defeated lump of a man....muttering and swearing about those bastards and their little game when a guy climbed on the bike next to me. " Wow, good effort !!!! 323 Watts average is huge...you must be Flick, right ?"
" Thanks...and yeah I'm Flick", I got out between gasps.
" Oh, nice to meet you. I'm Bob Benson"
Saturday, February 20, 2010
Dear Tiger
Unless you banged my wife or sister, I'm fairly certain that you don't owe me an apology.
If you miss the Master and US Open and I have to spend an entire season watching Phil Michaelson's man boobs THEN you're going to own me an apology.
Just go golf.
If you miss the Master and US Open and I have to spend an entire season watching Phil Michaelson's man boobs THEN you're going to own me an apology.
Just go golf.
Thursday, February 18, 2010
the guy who flew the plane into the IRS building was crazy right ?
He sure writes pretty well for a crazy person.
You can only poke people with the stick of fear...of H1N1, terrorism, economic collapse, of a secret Muslim/socialist president....before some of those people start to get pissed off.
Flying a plane into a building qualifies as pissed off.
You can only poke people with the stick of fear...of H1N1, terrorism, economic collapse, of a secret Muslim/socialist president....before some of those people start to get pissed off.
Flying a plane into a building qualifies as pissed off.
Wednesday, February 17, 2010
before you jump to judgement
Its been announced that Joe Papp plead guilty to charges today.
I don't want to go into it except to say a couple of things.
1 - Wait until you hear more of the story before you draw any conclusions.
2 - I believe this action, from what I know, sets anti-doping BACK, not forward.
3 - The prosecuting Federal D.A. also announced TODAY, her candidacy for U.S. Congress.
This is also very interesting
I don't want to go into it except to say a couple of things.
1 - Wait until you hear more of the story before you draw any conclusions.
2 - I believe this action, from what I know, sets anti-doping BACK, not forward.
3 - The prosecuting Federal D.A. also announced TODAY, her candidacy for U.S. Congress.
This is also very interesting
Tuesday, February 16, 2010
Its not MY fault !
"Landis said he didn't not know why the French judicial system was pursuing the hacking charges. "But certainly I hope it's not lost on anyone that it is a grand admission to having substandard computers at their self-proclaimed 'nation's best lab'."
Exactly!!!! And if she didn't want raped then she shouldn't have worn pants so easy to tear off !
I cannot fathom how both this guy and Tyler continue to have supporters, while Joe Papp and David Walsh continue to be hated. Then again Sarah Palin is a presidential candidate so I suppose anything is possible.
Exactly!!!! And if she didn't want raped then she shouldn't have worn pants so easy to tear off !
I cannot fathom how both this guy and Tyler continue to have supporters, while Joe Papp and David Walsh continue to be hated. Then again Sarah Palin is a presidential candidate so I suppose anything is possible.
'snow problem whatsoever
I've been trying to make the best out of the bad weather and found a little luck this weekend.
Friday night I took the kids to the Fire and Ice Festival in Lititz. They shut down the streets and have a giant block party. This included games, music, magicians, and guys making giant ice sculptures all around town. Saturday ( the fire part) was a big chili cook off. Lititz is a neat town, and its those type of creative community efforts that keep it a vibrant Borough in a County with many failing communities.
Saturday I did some cross county skiing for the first time at a local golf course. If was a good workout and a lot of fun. I borrowed some skis, but if I knew that we'd get snow with any sort of regularity, its an investment I'd make. The only catch was that the trail was set a little close to a golf driving range, so you had to be careful when getting close to the golfers.
Sunday I couldn't borrow the skis, so I went to the driving range and hit two buckets of balls at the skiers.
Yesterday the whole family went over to Ski Roundtop for a full day of skiing. The youngest finally found her balance which made the day perfect as we could all go to the top and we ended up staying a couple hours longer than expected. It started snowing during the last hour and a half and the conditions were absolutely perfect.
I got home last night with the expectation of showering, getting into bed early with my wife, and getting a good nights sleep. I was exhausted. Those plans were skuttled when my daughter started throwing up at 8 pm. She finished throwing up at 4 am. The joys of parenting.
I'm just grateful for 50 cent refills at Starbucks.
Friday night I took the kids to the Fire and Ice Festival in Lititz. They shut down the streets and have a giant block party. This included games, music, magicians, and guys making giant ice sculptures all around town. Saturday ( the fire part) was a big chili cook off. Lititz is a neat town, and its those type of creative community efforts that keep it a vibrant Borough in a County with many failing communities.
Saturday I did some cross county skiing for the first time at a local golf course. If was a good workout and a lot of fun. I borrowed some skis, but if I knew that we'd get snow with any sort of regularity, its an investment I'd make. The only catch was that the trail was set a little close to a golf driving range, so you had to be careful when getting close to the golfers.
Sunday I couldn't borrow the skis, so I went to the driving range and hit two buckets of balls at the skiers.
Yesterday the whole family went over to Ski Roundtop for a full day of skiing. The youngest finally found her balance which made the day perfect as we could all go to the top and we ended up staying a couple hours longer than expected. It started snowing during the last hour and a half and the conditions were absolutely perfect.
I got home last night with the expectation of showering, getting into bed early with my wife, and getting a good nights sleep. I was exhausted. Those plans were skuttled when my daughter started throwing up at 8 pm. She finished throwing up at 4 am. The joys of parenting.
I'm just grateful for 50 cent refills at Starbucks.
Thursday, February 11, 2010
murder rate
Whatever the murder rate of any community, I can't believe its that low.
There are a significant number of people walking around almost begging to to be shot.
For whatever reason, most of them seem to seek me out.
There are a significant number of people walking around almost begging to to be shot.
For whatever reason, most of them seem to seek me out.
Thursday, February 04, 2010
hell in a handbasket
Mark Sanford didn't want FIDELITY included in his marriage vows. And his wife is surprised that he was cheating ?!
Who the hell does Tom Watson think he is ?
Lief Garrett is going bald !!!
GREAT PIC HERE
I'm done reading the paper for a couple of days.
Who the hell does Tom Watson think he is ?
Lief Garrett is going bald !!!
GREAT PIC HERE
I'm done reading the paper for a couple of days.
Wednesday, February 03, 2010
Rahm
So Rahm calls a group of Congressmen " fucking retards".
That's not news.
The fact that the retards are pissed about being associated with Congressmen, now that's news. And it tells you a lot about public approval of Congress right now.
That's not news.
The fact that the retards are pissed about being associated with Congressmen, now that's news. And it tells you a lot about public approval of Congress right now.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)