lube

I have a triathlon coming up and a friend lent me his wetsuit with the instructions, " its tight, get some Pam cooking spray or Body Glide for your wrists and ankles".

So yesterday when my wife was heading up to CVS to pick up a presecription I went with her. She went back to the pharmacy while I wandered around.

A college aged employee approached me, " Can I help you find something sir ?"

" Yeah, I'm looking for Body Glide"

" I'm not sure I know what that is."

"Well", I explained, " What I need is something slick, but it can't be Vasoline. It has to be non-petroleum based."

" Hmmm, hang on", then he grabbed a young woman who was stocking shelves, " Hey Lisa, this gentleman is looking for some non-petroleum based lubricants."

She stopped what she was doing, turned around, gave him the once over then gave me the once over. It was then that it occurred to me that this was not as it appeared to be. Before I could say anything she said, " Aisle 3", and the guy started walking off.

Aisle 3 of course was filled with your standard Aisle 3 fare....condoms, birth control tests, and a vast array of lubricants. Our CVS man gestured toward the stack and said, " Here you are, anything in particular your looking for ?"

Thats when unsuspecting wife walked up, " OH hey great you found it ! No, no, no.." she started weeding her way through all the flavored lubes, " No, this is no good, this work work " Out of the corner of my eye I could see the college kid perk up as he watched my wife select her lube of choice.

" Ahhh this will be perfect, exactly what you're looking for !", she said.

That's all I could take. " This is NOT what it looks like !" I tried to explain to the kid, " You see I have this wetsuit...." I implored.

" Whatever you say sir", as he smiled a very smug smile and wandered off with a wave.