With the popularity of televised poker, you can hardly flip throught the stations without catching some guys sitting around a table with a big crowd, hot waitresses, and tuxedo wearing dealers. As with most things on TV, "your results may vary".
Stud was the casino poker game of choice for 35 years, right up until Chris Moneymaker gave everyone false hope. Now it's all about Hold'em and its tough to find a Stud game live, so when I passed one with an open seat at the Taj Mahal I couldn't pass it up. I should have kept walking.
The guy to my right had an open wound on his gigantic nose. He dealt with this by wrapping the cut with scotch tape. So on the endof his giant nose was a giant ball of transparent tape. And of course, through the monstrosity you could still make out the vulgar wound.
Sadly, I had no choice but to look in his direction because the guy on the other side of me had just shit his pants. And I don't mean that as some code for farted or something, I mean he literally vacated his bowels in his pants.
The smell was unbearable. I looked at the younger guy* across the table from me sitting on the other side of Mr. Poopy pants and his eyes were bugging out as he gave me a shrug. (* I say younger because everyone else at the table was at least 147 years old)
Out of respect I figured I'd give the old man 2 more hands and then I was getting up. I wasn't going to say anything, but then again I wasn't going to sit there !
Finally, mercifully, he excused himself and scooted his little cart away from the table.
I looked over at the other dude across from me and before I could say anything he went..
BAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHhhhhhhhhhhhhhh
The friggen guy had been holding his breath for what musta been a Houdini like 4 minutes.
Yeah, the glamourous lifestyle of poker.
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
No comments:
Post a Comment