Regular readers might recall my desire to own a set of lawn darts. Unfortunately since 1997 the FEDERAL government has decided that "free" Americans cannot be trusted with such deadly instruments of merriment.
From the Consumer Protection Agency:
" Effective December 19, 1988, all lawn darts are banned from sale in the United States. Lawn darts, used in an outdoor game, have been responsible for the deaths of 3 children. "
It should be noted that the specific incident that caused lawn darts to be made illegal also involved beer, and that, when engaged in responsibly, the recreational use of lawn darts is no more dangerous than baseball.
3 deaths since 19-fucking-70 ?!?!?! If their parents are running around drunk chucking giant darts at each other those kids were probably going to die or something sooner or later anyway.
So now if you get caught selling lawn darts in the United States...ship lawn darts in the United States....or facilitate the sale of lawn darts in these United States...it is a FEDERAL offense !!!
Not even ebay is messing with that shit...althought this dude is really pushing the envelope....empty box for $40....cha !
These guys crack me up. They're not selling lawn darts...that would be illegal. They are, however, selling lawn dart parts...which is perfectly on the up and up. What you do with the parts....like say...assemble them...is all on you.
I'm considering going into business myself. I'm going to start selling "ornate tent stakes" I mean most tents stakes are bland. If you're having some friends over for a cookout, you don't want to have the whole event ruined by a hum-drum post holding your tent aloft. Here's what you need.
Yeah, ornate tent stakes. Do NOT set 30 feet apart. Do NOT score3 points for a ringer.
Lemme know how many you'll need.
1 comment:
Sign me up. I used to throw a mean lawndart. Unfortunately I didn't get many points because it was usually at my brother's head.
I wonder in what creative way I can get a toy banned by killing my kid with it....
Post a Comment