Have we learned nothing ?

There is a disconnect between the way that I think and the way that the people who sell cars, houses, and loans think. Unfortunately, that disconnect triggers the need for me to punch someone in the face so quickly that its never afforded me enough time to work past it.

Previous attempts to purchase such items have resulted in me walking out of closings, insulting people, and in one instance threats of physical violence.

I think the problem is that most people walk into the office with the mentality, " I can afford $xxx.xx per month, what can I buy", and so that's the only position from which the lenders/sellers are used to working.

So I ask questions like, " How much is that car ?" and they reply, " How much are you looking to pay a month", then I flip out.

Recently I've been attempting to refinance my mortgage to no avail.

I have one mortgage with 7 years left on it, and a second, much smaller mortgage, with something like 20 years on it. What I'd like to do is combine those two loans into one loan. The questions I have are rather simple;

1) What's the rate I can get on a fixed mortgage for a 10 year term

2) If I accept that rate, what the comparison between what I'll pay over that 10 year year ( total money paid) versus what I'm going to pay under my current arrangement. NOT EACH MONTH....TOTAL !

3) If a lower rate is offered by me paying a point or two, what does paying the point save me over the length of the loan ?

See I don't see how any of that is difficult.

I can provide the ammts and terms of the loan I currently have.
I have excellent/perfect credit
I meet all the wage and home equity requirements.

You don't need my social security number.
You don't need to know how much I'm willing to pay.
You don't need how much money I have in the bank or where or I work or any other personal information.

If the information you provide looks like its a good deal for me, then we can go through all that stuff...just give me the numbers.

WHY WONT YOU GIVE ME THE NUMBERS !?