I'm wondering if this blog is unhealthy

So I got jammed up in traffic the other day because people on the cross road were stopping in the middle of the intersection and then the light would change. So people in out lane, feeling cheated, would then all try to get through the yellow light and when the light changed, they'd be blocking the intersection the other way. In the end it had become a giant fuck-you-fest with everyone screwing each other and nobody getting anywhere.

If everyone would have just been patient, waited their turn, and been polite...or at least civil, then we all would have been out of there in no time.

The whole thing got infuriating to the point where I was feeling the strong desire to take action. I was about 3 cars back and the light was about to turn and this lady ( omg I'm getting pissed right now writing this) this lady pulled right out into the middle of the intersection KNOWING that she was going to fuck all the cross traffic. You KNEW that she KNEW because she stared straight ahead blankly totally ignoring the existance of the people she just blocked and not acknowledging the fact that what she was doing was just an asshole shitty thing to do.

So my first thought was " I'm going to go up there. I'm going to stand on her hood. And I'm going to take a poop right on her windshield."

I actually put my emergency brake on and started to quickly work out the logistics and timing of it all. I mean the last thing I could let happen is that I'd be standing on her hood with my drawers down and the traffic ahead of her cleared and then she'd peel wheels out of there and send me flying.

As I was working it out I started to get a little more control of myself and decided that it probably wasn't the best course of action.

That's where the blog came in.

For the briefest of seconds I thought...." well, if i just go ahead and do it it WOULD make for something decent to write about for the blog". Luckily the traffic cleared, i release the brake and I got on my way.

But ultimately, that aint right ! I mean, I'm up for finding some interesting content and I find this blog to be somewhat theraputic, but the last thing that I need is to encourage my impulses. Subduing them is already a full time job.

And then today, my brother-in-law was worried about rain messing up our golf. I pointed out that there's a 60% chance of no rain at all. He was surprised..." I'd never take you for an optimist" he wrote. This was stunning to me. I'm the happiest guy i know. I define the glass half full. I mean, sure, chasing a hill-billy around his pick-up screaming " stay still, I'm gonna rape you with my bike pump"* probably doesn't fit the classic definition of optimist, but I'm the new breed of optimist....a neo-optimist if you will.

(* reminder to me to write the pump-a-rapin' story next week)

Then it occurred to me that the only time this guy sees me is after I've driven two hours in the van with all three kids and a tragicly car-nervous wife...and I've spent the afternoon guzzling beer and hanging out with 100 relatives. I suppose that could give you a skewed perspective on someone. THEN i realized that his only other insight is that occassionally he checks out this blog. HOLY CRAP. I should be happy that all he thinks is that I'm a pessimist. If I read this thing, I'd think the guy writing it should be institutionalized. I'm a friggin loon...and an illiterate loon to boot.

So to anyone reading this stuff I'd like to relieve any concerns. I'm fine. I'm in good shape. Underneath of all the gambling, and drinking, the drugs, the anal-fixation, the anger, and threatening people, I'm a perfect happy, well adjusted guy. No worries.